Postpartum Joys

Well, I am now 8 days postpartum and I have a few things to say.  Now, I am going to be as simple as possible and refrain from being too graphic :)

Here are my "Joys" of Postpartum.  Note that if I use quotations around the word "joy", it is safe to assume that there is some sarcasm behind it. Please also note that these are in no particular order.  I am confident that all of these have taken the number one spot on the list at least twice today :)

The First "Joy" of Postpartum: Lack of Sleep

Not only have I had extremely restless sleep for the last 6 months, but throw two babies into the mix who have their days and nights mixed up, and you have a woman (and her hard working husband) who is running on empty. They came to us sleeping 4-5 hrs at a time during the day and as soon as 10pm hit, they were wide awake and ready to eat every two hrs. Once 7 am rolled around, they were back to their 4-5 hr stretches. Ugh. Now, it is also pertinent to note that although they were giving us two hour stretches between feedings, you start counting from the time they start eating.  So, say they woke up at 10 pm to eat, it then takes at least one full hour to change their diapers, nurse them, feed them from a bottle to make up for my lack of milk (*more on this "joy" later), pump, and put them back down. By the time our heads hit the pillow, our precious bundles of joy (no sarcasm here, I promise!) were up again an hour later.  The first night we got 3, 1 hr stretches.  The next night, exact same thing.  One other point, my cute little Street is a binkie boy!  We love this for the most part, but when they are this young, the binkie pops out quite frequently.  Anytime it did, he was sure to let us know about it.  So, the "1 hr stretches" we had, really consisted of hopping out of bed every few minutes to stick that darn binkie back in. Ah!!

Monday brought a visit to the Pediatrician. We asked for some tips on getting their clock switched around and she said to be sure to wake them up every 2-3 hours during the day to eat and it should help them fix their night and day mix up.  Well, since I am a very tired mama, waking them up every two hours to eat was a little too much to handle, but I decided every 3 was do-able.  I'm glad we listened.  The next night brought them eating every 3 hours and the next night we got one 4 hour eating stretch.  Note that this means we got a 2 hr sleep stretch, and a 3 hr sleep stretch, respectively.

Also, something important to note:  They have very different personalities when it comes to sleeping.  Livvi is very much like Daci was.  If we let her, she would go at least 4-5 hours at night as well.  Problem is her cute younger brother likes to get up every two.  When you have twins it is VERY important to keep them on the same schedule.  So, poor Livvi gets woken up every two hours to eat.  Luckily, she has a very easy going temperament and doesn't seem to mind in the least.  Mom and Dad on the other hand....have something to say about it :)

Second "Joy" of Postpartum: Pain!

Lets just say the word "tear" is not one that a woman likes to hear after delivery.  'Nuf said.

Third "Joy" of Postpartum:  Nursing

One of the side effects of Lupus is low milk supply.  With Daci I had virtually nothing.  I also had a few other things happen that lowered it even more.  I got Shingles 3 weeks after giving birth and had to go on a steroid.  I only had a crappy electric single pump to use while I was in the "pump and dump" phase of the medication and lost a lot of my supply.  Then, my Lupus became really bad (we didn't know it was Lupus at the time).  I was supplementing with her from day one and by the third month all I would get after  a pumping session was about a 1/4 ounce between the two sides.  It was really hard for me to give it up and I felt a lot of guilt associated with it.  Why do we do that as women!?  When I hear a story like that from someone else I say, "Well its obvious you had to stop, you were killing yourself!  You shouldn't feel guilty for something you can't control.  I'm sure you were a much better mom once you stopped putting yourself through the exhausting routine of trying to nurse, feed from a bottle and pump!"  But alas, it doesn't work that way on ourselves, does it?

This time, I was very hopeful it would be different since my Lupus is diagnosed and under control.  And it has been different.  I do have more milk than I did the first time around.  I would even have enough milk, if I only had one baby.  But, I have two babies, and there isn't quite enough milk to go around.  Soooooo, I have been doing everything physically possible to get the supply up.  I nurse and pump round the clock.  I drink tons of water and eat a healthy diet (thanks to my mom!). I went to the lactation specialist yesterday and got great tips.  I am trying and trying.  I want my babies to have breast milk, it is very important to me, thats why I am putting myself through the tiring routine.  But it is just that...tiring!  My body is working on overload trying to produce the amount that I need and I am pooped!

Not only is it hard not having the supply but I am also very sensitive in that region.  Lets just say lots of blood, scabs and little pieces falling off.  Too graphic?  Sorry about that!  One thing that has helped?  Shields!

Fourth "Joy" of Postpartum: Emotional Roller Coaster

I am a MESS!  I will be happy and excited and encouraged one moment and 10 minutes later, the roller coaster is at the bottom of the hill and I am a sobbing, bawling, soggy basket case.  I think I cry every hour over things that I would never cry over.  I am so stressed about nursing and so tired from not sleeping that every little thing puts me over the edge.  Luckily, I have a mom and grandma that insist that I take a nap once a day or I may be checked into the hospital again....for other reasons.

I am completely, 100% overwhelmed.  It is taking 3 (4, when Rick is home) adults to take care of two babies, a postpartum girl (that's me), my cute Daci, meals, the house, the grocery shopping, and the laundry.  Every time I think of not having these extra sets of hands I have an emotional breakdown.  Cue the tears.....better stop writing about this one.

The Only REAL Joy of Postpartum (notice, no quotes) That Really Matters:  My Babies!


It doesn't matter how hard it is to have babies, feed babies, or sleep train babies.  It is all 100% worth it! I am smitten by these two!  I seriously could stare at them forever.  They make the cutest little faces and noises and I am so annoying with my, "Mom!  Look at this!" or "Grandma, how funny is this!?"  or "RICK! Wake up!  Look how cute they are!" Haha.  Really I love these two more than I can express. Despite all the hardships of postpartum...they are the true JOYS in my life.




Cue Snap Happy Photos:



STREET:
Birth Weight: 6 lb 8 oz
Going Home Weight: 6 lb 1 oz
Weight at First Dr. Appt., Day 5: 6 lb 5 oz (10th percentile), 19.5 inches (25th percentile), Head Circum: 13 inches (10th percentile)
Weight at Lactation Specialist on Day 7: 6 lb 9 oz

Bright eyes

Occasionally finds his thumb

All ready for his first doctor's appt.

Such a sweetie!  He was wrapped in a pink blankie at the time, so I changed the photo to black and white :)

Chillin out in the boppy

Loves to have his fists next to his face

LIVVI:

Birth Weight: 6 lb 3 oz

Going Home Weight: 5 lb 12 oz

Stats at First Dr. Appt, Day 5: 6 lb 1 oz (10th percentile), 19 inches long (25th percentile), Head circum: 13.5 inches (25th percentile)

Weight at Lactation Specialist on Day 7: 6 lbs 5 ounces

Our Happy, Easy-Going Girl

Ready for the Dr.

Smiling in her sleep

THE DYNAMIC DUO:

I love that they sleep together

They always end up facing each other and scooting in close together . Livvi always rolls up on her side. 

FAMILY TIME

With nursing I kinda live in comfy silky button up jammies right now

Lovin me some Livvi

Daddy and Son Tummy Time. Street loves his tummy! 

Great Grandma (GG) with her second and third great grandchildren

Grandma feeding Street

Aunt Carly feeding Livvi

Another Important Joy (no quotes!): My Sweet Daci Bug

Daci has done great through all of this!  My mom and grandma have been sure to do lots of fun things with her and give her lots of special attention.  She also loves to do "Big Sister Helpers".  She throws away the diapers and brings me things that I need.  She loves the twins and hasn't had too many behavioral problems....just a few occasional ones :)  Love you Daci Doodle!  Thanks for being a trooper with your emotional mom!

Grandma and Daci making cookies

Such a big helper!

Playing in the snow!